As of the date of this blog, I have 6 working days remaining
in my tenure at my current employer. I’ll explain below.
Back in early July, my boss came into my office and gave me
some, at the time, rather stressful news. He said that he had restructured the
support team I am part of, and alluded to the fact that I wasn’t in the plan
for the restructure. This quite obviously gave me heartburn, as I’ve been
employed by the same parent company for 8 years now. I remember exactly how I
felt as the conversation went on and came to a close. My body started shaking,
my heart was racing; so fast it felt like it was going to jump out of my chest,
my thoughts were going nearly as fast as my heart was. I was livid, hurt and
sad, all at the same time. I told my coworker I needed to leave, which was
completely understandable since I’d just heard some pretty heavy news, and
managed to hold back a few tears until I got in my car.
The news came on a Thursday. I worked Friday like normal, my
thoughts abound with “what if” and “coulda, shoulda, woulda”, into the weekend.
The following Monday I started fishing, using my résumé as the bait. There were
several opportunities, but only about one percent of them actually returned
anything. My first two interviews were busts. Something about me didn’t jive
with what they wanted. I found myself feeling more and more stress as time went
on, knowing that my time with the current employer was finite. In a last-ditch
effort, I sent my resume out to one more good looking candidate; an insurance
firm. Within a week, I was hired. Stress managed.
With the job hunt out of the way, I started counting of the
days I had left with the current employer. Not out of excitement or anything,
but just to keep track of things. I do that.
As the days go by, I reflect on my time served here and how
I will be in the new job. I get both excited and frightened when I think about
it. I talked to my mentor today about all the various feelings I’ve been
having, and he helped me validate some of them. The others, he explained to me
that I should be seeing this as a time for introspect and reflection. Think
back on the time I’ve spent here - what I did right, what I did wrong, what I
can improve on, etc. Think about these points, reflect on them, find what they
really mean to me and then figure out how I can apply the lessons and knowledge
I’ve acquired to the new job. Essentially, grow.
So here I am now, writing this for all to see. I suppose
this is my way of starting the process of reflection; I find it much easier to
comprehend my thoughts when they’re written.
Funny, I seem to have lost the inspiration to write any more
this afternoon. Ah, well. I feel this won’t stop here. In fact, I’d be
surprised at myself if I didn’t have another blog post within the next week or
so, as time moves toward my jump between stages in life.
Until next time…
